Two weeks ago I wrote about navigating the unknown and the importance of strengthening our ‘change muscle’ by sitting in discomfort. Speaking from experience and with research to support it, we know the more we proactively put ourselves outside our comfort zones, not only do we grow, but our brains are better trained to handle all the unknowns that life throws at us. And why wouldn’t we want to better equip ourselves for the only thing that is constant in life? Because the only thing we can really count on is change.

I am in the midst of taking more steps to build out my work in the positivity space, and there are elements of the unknown in every decision I make. As the human brain guarantees, along with that unknown, comes the unsolicited neurological reactions of worry and other mind-chatter. So I’ve been navigating through this using techniques from positive psychology.

And isn’t it interesting that when you need a good dose of perspective, the universe just seems to give it to you? Sometimes random things happen that allow you to connect dots that you knew you needed to connect, but just couldn’t get there with your conscious mind. And that dot can get connected by a something as simple as an encounter with a little kid.

This week, I was at a donor breakfast for Big Brothers, Big Sisters, the 501c3 that matches adult mentors with kids in need. Before the program started, a children’s chorus made up of about a dozen 7-12 year olds walked in the room. You could only see the tops of their heads over the sea of business suit filled tables in the Union League ballroom. Their cute high-pitched voices proceeded to sing, “Don’t You Worry ‘Bout a Thing” by Stevie Wonder.

It was just what I needed. My subconscious mind immediately generated a dose of perspective. There was something about a small group of innocent children with no understanding of the challenges of adult life – singing to a room full of adults not to worry. These children are in need – they come from broken homes with both or one parent absent and are really learning to deal with change. And their brains aren’t yet fully equipped to handle the emotional turbulence of a bad neighborhood or family situation. But they are, without knowing it, learning how to deal with change. And that innocence will help them get through it.

We forget what its like to come at the world from that perspective – bright eyed, curious, impressionable, honest and open. They may not have to convince themselves “not to worry about a thing” because they don’t yet have the adult gifts of cynicism, bias or expectation of how things and people should be. And in that moment, listening to those kids sing, I regained some perspective.

Every so often, it can be pretty inspirational to jolt yourself out of your autopilot mental narrative and come at the world with some of that child-like wonder. Replace your narrative with positive affirmations that things will turn out as they should, new things are meant to be tried, unknowns can be exiting, risks should be taken, life is meant to be lived, and there’s no need to worry.

This week, I was reminded of an important lesson – one that we often take for granted.

I talk about finding fulfillment by living in the moment – being aware of life moving around you, accepting others, embracing your authentic self and practicing gratitude. But despite our most genuine intentions, there is something that happens to all of us every so often. It is this feeling of dissatisfaction with what we have or why we find ourselves in certain circumstances. Sometimes we manifest that disappointment as we nit pick the people closest to us – or ourselves. Human nature leads us to desire what we don’t or can’t have.

It is while we are left in solitude and allowed to be alone with our thoughts, though, that our minds automatically reframe our perspective on what previously seemed so unfortunate and heavy. It is almost as if we become stripped-down versions of ourselves while we sit in silence and reflect. We're suddenly able to think clearly without noise or distraction. The whole experience is kind of like a mental reboot process.

So what happens when you are never alone with your thoughts? You wake up after a week’s routine of work, eat, sleep and realize you were living in an pretty harried state for 5 days. You might feel like you are only now able to consciously evaluate what has happened over the week.

Without time to be alone with our thoughts, it can be easy to get caught up in negativity or complaint. It takes willpower to push beyond that human state of desire to experience an emergence out of that negativity. That willpower takes practice. So try this: practice sitting in solitude, meditating, saying or writing about the things you are grateful for, and incorporating mindfulness into your routine. If we all got into these habits, maybe we would realize we are exactly where we are supposed to be in our lives. Maybe we would all feel content and at peace with what we have and who we are. Maybe we would stop nit picking. And maybe in the future we'll be able to recognize the dissatisfaction as it is happening and course correct on the spot.

Ashley Fern of Elite Daily makes great points in this article about reframing our thoughts on what we have and what we don’t have. She summarizes it all in one word – appreciation.

Appreciate. It is a simple concept but one we must forcibly remind ourselves of. Think about it. How do you keep your life in perspective?